What Have You Done for YOU Lately?

 Now that the holidays are over it’s time to take a breather. You’ve probably been so busy doing everything for everyone else that you may have neglected yourself. Well, ladies, it’s time for a little TLC!

As women, we are often the caregivers for our family and we work hard to take care of those we love. Yet when we are constantly caring for others our tank becomes empty and our batteries need to be recharged. Taking time out to take care of ourselves can help us refill our tanks so that we have more to give. When we’re replenished we’re happier, more relaxed and able to take on life with a more positive attitude. Plus when we boost our image we boost our self confidence!

But where to start? If it’s been so long since you’ve taken time out just for yourself you don’t even know where to begin, here are a few suggestions to get you started. But don’t just stick to my list, take these and run wild!

1. Have your makeup updated for the new season – try new colors, techniques and products. Choose an afternoon where you have time to relax and indulge yourself so you’re not feeling rushed and ask for the works. Take note of application techniques and ask questions.  You can focus just on lipstick, eyes or your whole face.   Then buy only those products you know you’ll really use.

2. Reassess your lingerie – Do you still have bras from ten years ago? Ditch ‘em and take yourself for a bra fitting. Most lingerie boutiques and many department stores have knowledgable sales people who can help and make recommendations just for you. But don’t stop with bras. Take stock of your panties and give shapewear a try. Along with another year come new bumps and bulges. Shapewear can help smooth these out and have you looking slimmer and trimmer than ever.  And this time of year sales abound!

3. Have a fit – Do you have pants that drag the ground? Skirts that graze mid-calf? Jackets that are just enough too long that they make you look shorter? Then go through your closet and have those items that need alterations taken to the tailor. It’s amazing what alterations can do to boost your image and help your clothes fit like a glove.

4. Adorn Yourself – are you afraid of wearing accessories or don’t know where to start? Well it’s time you became in the know! Jewelry, scarves, handbags, hats and shoes are the quickest (and most fun!) way to update your look and create a polished image. Start small and create a “signature” item: if you find you really love bracelets then start a collection and wear several at once. If you love handcrafted earrings then build your outfits around them. You’ll create your own unique style in the process.

5. Don’t Lose Weight – Yes, you read that right! No matter what your weight, you’re beautiful right now! What, you can’t see it because you’re hiding behind that muu muu? Well it’s high time you packed those baggy sacks away and put on clothes that show YOU off. Focus on your best assets (your eyes, your legs, your hair, your smile!) and the rest will just melt into the background. Don’t forget accessories, but most importantly, wear your confidence – you are gorgeous! Don’t be surprised if you get asked, “have you lost weight?’ Simply smile and relish the attention!

6. Make a date with yourself – When’s the last time you put YOU on your schedule or your to-do list? I want to encourage you to schedule some time just for you this week. On your calendar, in pen. It could be an afternoon of shopping, a trip to the spa, a few quiet minutes to meditate or just some time spent at the bookstore reading magazines and sipping a steaming cup of tea. My point is that you don’t have to spend any money but you do need to make time in your life to reconnect with yourself.

7. Start a style journal – Write down ideas for outfits, paste in pictures of things you think are very YOU, record any drawings of details or accessories you’d like to look for. Take some time to think about your personal style and reflect on how it’s changed over the years. What common elements do you see? Do you feel your style needs an update? If so, what could you quickly and easily change that would give you a boost?

8. Pretend you’re a tourist – Dress up and wear your nicest dress, that hat you’ve been saving or that expensive blouse, and head out on a lunch date with your girlfriend, your man or even yourself. You don’t have to be in New York or Paris to dress like it! Wear things in a way you wouldn’t normally in your home town. Book a reservation at that little bistro you’ve been wanting to try. Sip champagne or have a cappuccino. Take the rest of the day off for sightseeing and shopping. Stop for tea and a pastry. Take pictures and see things in a new way. You’ll go home with a fresh perspective and an appreciation for being right where you are.

9. Have a spa night– Invite your girlfriends over or just powwow with your daughter. Have a special snack and do nails, tweeze brows, brush hair, play with makeup and give massages. It’s a nice “girls’ night in” and a great way to catch up on some personal grooming.

10. Organize Your Closet – Whether you work with a professional or want to tackle it yourself, spending some time to revamp your wardrobe and overhaul your closet is time well spent.  It can make getting dressed quick and easy, give you a new perspective on your style and yourself, and leave you feeling fabulous each time you go to your closet instead of feeling stressed-out.  Sort through your clothes and donate anything that doesn’t fit, doesn’t flatter or you just don’t like.  If you haven’t worn it in more than a year, pitch it!  Then organize your clothes by style, and within each style sort by color.  Treat yourself to some new hangers.  Plastic or flocked velvet are my favorites, but wood can be nice too.  Please, no more wire hangers!  Also, do what you can to make your closet more visually appealing.  Clear out clutter, put shoes in clear storage containers and ensure your closet looks as great as you’d like to when you emerge from it!

Taking some time out for yourself can leave you feeling refreshed and ready to tackle your to-do list with ease and grace.  I’d love to hear your favorite way to take time out for yourself.

Beautiful Quote

‎”A totally different YOU can emerge from a totally different IDEA that you have about yourself. All it takes is a decision to CHANGE YOUR MIND about WHO YOU ARE. and WHY you are here. Perspective is everything. What would it take to elevate your awareness on this day? Whatever it would take, do that. Don’t just think about it. Do it.” ~ Neale Donald Walsch

Image courtesy of http://www.ideachampions.com/

Do You Give Your Power Away? I Did!

There is a great quote from Eleanor Roosevelt that I love that says, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” Her perspective is so true, yet all too often I see women who put themselves into the role of victim and they give their power away. They don’t do it so overtly, but very often it begins with their appearance. Maybe they’ve gained a few pounds and don’t like the way their body looks, so they grab any old thing that fits and settle for the dirty tee shirt they wore yesterday. If they must go out, they hide behind a big, boxy jacket and slip on the most comfy shoes they can find. Makeup is non-existent and their hair, most likely, hasn’t been cut in 6 months or more and their roots are beyond showing. Sound familiar?

Now don’t get me wrong – I am not here to judge anyone. I am here to support women and to help them step into their power by expressing their authentic selves in their image. So few things drive me more crazy than seeing a beautiful woman ‘hiding out’ and playing small. Why is this so? Well, because this used to be me. There was a time when I had absolutely zero confidence in who I was as a person, and thought I had nothing to offer. I had a good childhood, so there wasn’t anything traumatic behind this. But I grew up being overweight in elementary school and through high school, and the effects this had on my self-esteem have been lifelong. It wasn’t until I was in college that I got a handle on my weight issues, but my low self-esteem that I left me dressing in a way that totally hid my body, my emotions and my true self. And because of having such low self esteem, I totally gave my power away. To friends, to boyfriends, to stylish women whom I admired. It’s been a journey for me to reclaim my power and to feel great in my own skin. I guess this is why I am so passionate about what I do because I know that it’s not just about how you look on the outside, but that in many cases, that’s where transformation can begin.

So when you look in the mirror how do you feel? Frumpy, fat and fatigued? How would it make you feel to look in the mirror and give yourself a high five for looking so great? It would affect your entire day and make an impact on everyone you come in contact with! You may be feeling overwhelmed and wonder where you even begin…

Reclaiming your power doesn’t have to take lots of hard work. Often it starts with a commitment to yourself that you will value YOU and not put everyone else first. Taking steps to look your best will get you off on the right foot and help you to feel great, no matter what your size or shape. Here are my 5 top tips for stepping into your power through your personal image:

1/ Wear clothing that truly fits your body. If you’ve gained weight, it can be depressing to squeeze into something that’s too tight, but hiding behind a tent can make you look even bigger. Clothing that skims the body and shows your shape can be more flattering and helps keep you from getting ‘lost’ or looking sleazy.

2/ Get a great haircut – color too! This makes a huge impact on your appearance and is something you’ll enjoy every single day. Make sure you discuss your lifestyle, face shape and coloring with your stylist to be assured you’ll get the perfect look. After all, if you’re a busy woman you want to look great but don’t have all morning to spend on your hair.

3/ Wear clothing that you LOVE! Wearing something that is a ‘should’ or that you just happen to have in your closet does nothing to inspire you. However when you put on a jacket that is so very YOU, you just can’t help but feel good in it!

4/ Reconnect with your current self – If you’re still dressing like you were in college, that’s likely to bring you down (however, if you can still fit in the clothes that’s awesome). Reevaluate who you are, what you like and what your lifestyle is. If you’ve made a change in recent years, ensure you’re dressing to suit that and not stuck in a rut from decades ago.

5/ The devil’s in the details – A little makeup goes a long way. Bring some color into your face with a pretty lipstick or gloss, brighten your eyes with pretty shadow and make them pop with mascara. It’ll make you smile! Add in some accessories that you just love and it will personalize your look while adding interest.

6/ Dress for the body you have right now – If you’ve had kids, lost weight or gained weight (be honest, nobody minds) then dress to enhance your assets and downplay your flaws. When you do you’ll look like a million bucks and feel great to boot! If you don’t know what your assets are try asking a trusted friend to point out what’s great about you!

Now that you know how to get dressed, it’s time for a little inner reflection. I want you to look at your self image and ask who you compare yourself to? Who do you give your power away and why? When did that start, and what belief about yourself did you form? If you grew up feeling like you were never pretty enough, take a look at yourself now and feel grateful for all your gorgeous assets! If you felt like you weren’t good enough, try feeling thankful for all your gifts and the ability to help others. It will help you to shift your perspective and to see that you are beautiful, you are valued and you are LOVED!

Marianne Williamson wrote, “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.” Her beautiful words have inspired me to feel great about who I am and to know that I can make a difference in women’s lives. I’d like to encourage you to embrace your power, however it might look and feel how beautiful you truly are!

Redefine Beauty on Your Own Terms

When you think of beauty, or a beautiful woman, what comes to mind? Chances are an airbrushed model with a rail thin body, flawless skin and perfect hair that flows down her back. Once you can picture her, what’s your next thought? Chances are, it’s “I could never look as good as she does in a million years. I hate her.”

While hate is a strong word that I don’t like to use, it’s a word that is used all too often when you compare yourself to someone to whom you think you could never match up to. So your defenses go up and you deflect your insecurities with a few cutting words that make you feel like you’re in control. But instead of being in control of your emotions, what this tells me is that it’s a hot-button issue for you. Maybe it’s time to redefine what beauty means to you.

The word beauty is defined at dictionary.com as the quality present in a thing or person that gives intense pleasure or deep satisfaction to the mind, whether arising from sensory manifestations (as shape, color, sound, etc.), a meaningful design or pattern, or something else (as a personality in which high spiritual qualities are manifest). Therefore, beauty is in the eye of the beholder and can be construed in a multitude of ways.

In our culture you have come to equate the notion of beauty with something that doesn’t necessarily exist in nature. You look at magazines and television and hold yourself up to the ideals portrayed in these media. What this does is creates an unrealistic expectation that you can never live up to (even the models don’t really look like their Photoshopped likenesses) and causes countless (and needless) comparisons which cause you to always feel inferior. Indeed, it is feelings of inferiority that the advertisers and purveyors play on to create a never ending demand for their goods. While these feelings may be putting billions of dollars into the pockets of the fashion industry, it’s time we women took back our self confidence and said NO MORE! It’s time that we redefined beauty on our own terms! How? Read on.

1/ To begin shifting your ideal of what beauty means to you it’s time for a little self-examination. To see beauty in others, you must first see it in yourself, so start by looking in the mirror. Instead of putting yourself down, take a closer look and see yourself through new eyes. What do you appreciate about your face, your hair, your body, your personality? Write it down and make a note to yourself. Put that note in your mirror and look at it every single day as a reminder. Play up whatever it is in the best way possible and show the world what you’ve got!

2/ Trust your intuition. This means everything from what clothing feels great on you to what to have for dinner to whether to leave your career and set out on your own. When you trust yourself and listen to your heart you build a confidence that is unrivaled and can send your self-worth soaring! There is nothing more beautiful than a confident woman who believes in herself, so this is key.

3/ Give it away. Share of yourself and your gifts in whatever way feels natural. It could be a simple act of kindness, volunteering or simply creating a business that lets you do what you do best to help others. Feeling fulfilled in your life will set off a chain reaction that leaves you exuding joy from the inside out. When you give to others it is a beautiful feeling that simply adds to your own natural beauty. After all, beauty radiates from the inside out – it doesn’t start with designer clothing but with a pure spirit and a joyful heart.

4/ Appreciate how you’re different. Whether you’re well-endowed or flat-chested, a size 0 or a 22, love the skin you’re in. We’re all created unique and were not meant to be carbon copies of each other. Embrace what you have and flaunt it to best effect. When you revel in your glory those around you will begin to appreciate every square inch of you too! You are good enough, no matter what and when you begin to feel whole and connected to yourself, your beauty can’t help but shine through!

Want to know how I can help you discover your own true beauty? Just e-mail me at Michele@OneChicMama.com to set up a 15-minute get acquainted call and discover how you can look your best each and every day!

Photo Credit: Solve Sundsbo from http://www.bvonstyle.com